Thursday, November 3, 2011
little happy::november 3rd
grateful for my friend ginnie and the other fc-4 gals...for the time we had and the lifelong friendships formed...ginnie and her hubby got their visas today and are officially moving to spain in january...been thinking of the blessing of having her in my life...
a whole month of thankful...
i have noticed several people have gotten on the bandwagon of posted thanks every day in november...thought it was a good idea...i'm going to do that...right now, i am going to do that retroactively and then you can watch this blog to see a new post each day...ah-one annah-two annah-way we gooooo....
november 1:: grateful for a place to stay in nashville so i could go and check out a school...grateful for the new friends who opened their home and included me in their life...
november 2:: grateful to be able to see several people i knew from dc...to spend time with them and hear about their lives...grateful to pick up without missing a beat...
new post next for today's little happy...
november 1:: grateful for a place to stay in nashville so i could go and check out a school...grateful for the new friends who opened their home and included me in their life...
november 2:: grateful to be able to see several people i knew from dc...to spend time with them and hear about their lives...grateful to pick up without missing a beat...
new post next for today's little happy...
Sunday, October 30, 2011
hope
Lamentations 3
Hope in the Lord’s Faithfulness
1 I am the one who has seen the afflictions that come from the rod of the Lord’s anger. 2 He has led me into darkness, shutting out all light. 3 He has turned his hand against me again and again, all day long.
4 He has made my skin and flesh grow old. He has broken my bones. 5 He has besieged and surrounded me with anguish and distress. 6 He has buried me in a dark place, like those long dead.
7 He has walled me in, and I cannot escape. He has bound me in heavy chains. 8 And though I cry and shout, he has shut out my prayers. 9 He has blocked my way with a high stone wall; he has made my road crooked.
10 He has hidden like a bear or a lion, waiting to attack me. 11 He has dragged me off the path and torn me in pieces, leaving me helpless and devastated. 12 He has drawn his bow and made me the target for his arrows.
13 He shot his arrows deep into my heart. 14 My own people laugh at me. All day long they sing their mocking songs. 15 He has filled me with bitterness and given me a bitter cup of sorrow to drink.
16 He has made me chew on gravel. He has rolled me in the dust. 17 Peace has been stripped away, and I have forgotten what prosperity is. 18 I cry out, “My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!”
19 The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words.[a] 20 I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. 21 Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this:
22 The faithful love of the Lord never ends![b] His mercies never cease. 23 Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. 24 I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”
25 The Lord is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him. 26 So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the Lord. 27 And it is good for people to submit at an early age to the yoke of his discipline:
28 Let them sit alone in silence beneath the Lord’s demands. 29 Let them lie face down in the dust, for there may be hope at last. 30 Let them turn the other cheek to those who strike them and accept the insults of their enemies.
31 For no one is abandoned by the Lord forever.
Hope in the Lord’s Faithfulness
1 I am the one who has seen the afflictions that come from the rod of the Lord’s anger. 2 He has led me into darkness, shutting out all light. 3 He has turned his hand against me again and again, all day long.
4 He has made my skin and flesh grow old. He has broken my bones. 5 He has besieged and surrounded me with anguish and distress. 6 He has buried me in a dark place, like those long dead.
7 He has walled me in, and I cannot escape. He has bound me in heavy chains. 8 And though I cry and shout, he has shut out my prayers. 9 He has blocked my way with a high stone wall; he has made my road crooked.
10 He has hidden like a bear or a lion, waiting to attack me. 11 He has dragged me off the path and torn me in pieces, leaving me helpless and devastated. 12 He has drawn his bow and made me the target for his arrows.
13 He shot his arrows deep into my heart. 14 My own people laugh at me. All day long they sing their mocking songs. 15 He has filled me with bitterness and given me a bitter cup of sorrow to drink.
16 He has made me chew on gravel. He has rolled me in the dust. 17 Peace has been stripped away, and I have forgotten what prosperity is. 18 I cry out, “My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!”
19 The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words.[a] 20 I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. 21 Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this:
22 The faithful love of the Lord never ends![b] His mercies never cease. 23 Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. 24 I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”
25 The Lord is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him. 26 So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the Lord. 27 And it is good for people to submit at an early age to the yoke of his discipline:
28 Let them sit alone in silence beneath the Lord’s demands. 29 Let them lie face down in the dust, for there may be hope at last. 30 Let them turn the other cheek to those who strike them and accept the insults of their enemies.
31 For no one is abandoned by the Lord forever.
reconciliation
Matthew 5:23-24: "Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar of whole burnt-offerings and there you remember that your brother has something against you, leave there your gift before the altar of the whole burnt-offerings and be going away. First be reconciled to your brother, and then, having come, be offering your gift."
God holds reconciliation and unity in such high esteem that we are told to leave the altar and make things right with our brothers, sisters...our friends. Seems like God is more interested in our unity than our sacrifice.
Who do you need to be reconciled with...who do you need to make things right with...we should fight for friendships...and cherish unity and hold reconciliation in high esteem! We should be willing to do whatever it takes to restore our friendships. We should learn to finish well.
God holds reconciliation and unity in such high esteem that we are told to leave the altar and make things right with our brothers, sisters...our friends. Seems like God is more interested in our unity than our sacrifice.
Who do you need to be reconciled with...who do you need to make things right with...we should fight for friendships...and cherish unity and hold reconciliation in high esteem! We should be willing to do whatever it takes to restore our friendships. We should learn to finish well.
trials...pain...and...waiting
i have to confess that i have failed many a test when it comes to the trials and pain i have encountered over the last several years...i used to be pretty good at this waiting and trust thing...i used to be a cock-eyed optimist...things didn't ruffle my feathers much...i was a joyful person...i was an encourager...
it's been a tough bunch of years...i've seen a lot of shocking and sudden disappointments and falling apart of so many things in my life...people suddenly changing and shutting me out...friendships gone without reason or explanation...dreams crushed...but that is not why i am posting...
i am writing because i realized today that i have failed...failed to respond well to all of these challenges...failed to walk in peace...to trust...to believe...i've failed to offer hope to anyone in the midst of my trials...i've exhibited hopelessness and despair...i have fainted in the day of adversity...my strength has been small...
and i am grieved that i had these opportunities to shine...to show forth hope...light in the darkness and i have chosen to sit in the pit and stay stuck in the miry clay...
but...
this is my hope::
Psalm 40[a] For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. 2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. 3 He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the LORD and put their trust in him.
4 Blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods.[b] 5 Many, LORD my God, are the wonders you have done, the things you planned for us. None can compare with you; were I to speak and tell of your deeds, they would be too many to declare.
6 Sacrifice and offering you did not desire— but my ears you have opened[c]— burnt offerings and sin offerings[d] you did not require. 7 Then I said, “Here I am, I have come— it is written about me in the scroll.[e] 8 I desire to do your will, my God; your law is within my heart.”
9 I proclaim your saving acts in the great assembly; I do not seal my lips, LORD, as you know. 10 I do not hide your righteousness in my heart; I speak of your faithfulness and your saving help. I do not conceal your love and your faithfulness from the great assembly.
11 Do not withhold your mercy from me, LORD; may your love and faithfulness always protect me. 12 For troubles without number surround me; my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see. They are more than the hairs of my head, and my heart fails within me. 13 Be pleased to save me, LORD; come quickly, LORD, to help me.
14 May all who want to take my life be put to shame and confusion; may all who desire my ruin be turned back in disgrace. 15 May those who say to me, “Aha! Aha!” be appalled at their own shame. 16 But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who long for your saving help always say, “The LORD is great!”
17 But as for me, I am poor and needy; may the Lord think of me. You are my help and my deliverer; you are my God, do not delay.
i want to move forward from here and cultivate hope and patience in waiting...i want to shine...so that no matter what comes my way, i will still have a song in my mouth that will encourage rather than despair...i want to take back my joy...and i want it to spill out all over everyone around me...
it's been a tough bunch of years...i've seen a lot of shocking and sudden disappointments and falling apart of so many things in my life...people suddenly changing and shutting me out...friendships gone without reason or explanation...dreams crushed...but that is not why i am posting...
i am writing because i realized today that i have failed...failed to respond well to all of these challenges...failed to walk in peace...to trust...to believe...i've failed to offer hope to anyone in the midst of my trials...i've exhibited hopelessness and despair...i have fainted in the day of adversity...my strength has been small...
and i am grieved that i had these opportunities to shine...to show forth hope...light in the darkness and i have chosen to sit in the pit and stay stuck in the miry clay...
but...
this is my hope::
Psalm 40[a] For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. 2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. 3 He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the LORD and put their trust in him.
4 Blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods.[b] 5 Many, LORD my God, are the wonders you have done, the things you planned for us. None can compare with you; were I to speak and tell of your deeds, they would be too many to declare.
6 Sacrifice and offering you did not desire— but my ears you have opened[c]— burnt offerings and sin offerings[d] you did not require. 7 Then I said, “Here I am, I have come— it is written about me in the scroll.[e] 8 I desire to do your will, my God; your law is within my heart.”
9 I proclaim your saving acts in the great assembly; I do not seal my lips, LORD, as you know. 10 I do not hide your righteousness in my heart; I speak of your faithfulness and your saving help. I do not conceal your love and your faithfulness from the great assembly.
11 Do not withhold your mercy from me, LORD; may your love and faithfulness always protect me. 12 For troubles without number surround me; my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see. They are more than the hairs of my head, and my heart fails within me. 13 Be pleased to save me, LORD; come quickly, LORD, to help me.
14 May all who want to take my life be put to shame and confusion; may all who desire my ruin be turned back in disgrace. 15 May those who say to me, “Aha! Aha!” be appalled at their own shame. 16 But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who long for your saving help always say, “The LORD is great!”
17 But as for me, I am poor and needy; may the Lord think of me. You are my help and my deliverer; you are my God, do not delay.
i want to move forward from here and cultivate hope and patience in waiting...i want to shine...so that no matter what comes my way, i will still have a song in my mouth that will encourage rather than despair...i want to take back my joy...and i want it to spill out all over everyone around me...
an update
so...in the last few weeks, i have called schools and visited schools and narrowed down schools and so forth and so on...i have not slept more than a few hours except for maybe one night...and it has felt as if every part of my life was either in utter chaos and turmoil or was falling apart on me for no apparent reason...to be honest, i have been ready to just give up altogether...
i had hoped to start in november, but after visiting the last two schools on my list and trying to crunch numbers to see how i could possibly make it work, i came to the realization that trying to force things was only going to end up in disaster...
so, i will be waiting until january to start school and here are the contenders::
atlanta school of aesthetics which has a medical focus, great equipment, wonderful faculty (i met every one of them and the owner on my visit) and the students seem happy...drawbacks are the cost and the part time schedule is not really condusive to working or living...
aveda school dc which is aveda (big plus) and by far the least expensive and the shortest of all the part time programs...drawbacks are it's downtown location (a metro ride every nite)...the fact the classes are evening...and originally i was worried that working all day and then metro'ing in to school all nite would be the death of me, but in rethinking my plans, i think i could get enough money from my loans to cover my living expenses...take on a few dance students and make it happen...
paul mitchell school nashville which i have not toured yet, but will look at on tuesday...i would not go here if my friend is not going to be moving to the area...lame, i know, but i desperately need the support of stable, safe, loyal, trustworthy friends who i can count on to be there and i don't want to move somewhere i will not have that...
so kids, that's the latest...hoping to know something by the middle of the month...ready for good things that stick...ready to be able to have something good in my life that will just get better and not worse for a change...cautiously optimistic...
i had hoped to start in november, but after visiting the last two schools on my list and trying to crunch numbers to see how i could possibly make it work, i came to the realization that trying to force things was only going to end up in disaster...
so, i will be waiting until january to start school and here are the contenders::
atlanta school of aesthetics which has a medical focus, great equipment, wonderful faculty (i met every one of them and the owner on my visit) and the students seem happy...drawbacks are the cost and the part time schedule is not really condusive to working or living...
aveda school dc which is aveda (big plus) and by far the least expensive and the shortest of all the part time programs...drawbacks are it's downtown location (a metro ride every nite)...the fact the classes are evening...and originally i was worried that working all day and then metro'ing in to school all nite would be the death of me, but in rethinking my plans, i think i could get enough money from my loans to cover my living expenses...take on a few dance students and make it happen...
paul mitchell school nashville which i have not toured yet, but will look at on tuesday...i would not go here if my friend is not going to be moving to the area...lame, i know, but i desperately need the support of stable, safe, loyal, trustworthy friends who i can count on to be there and i don't want to move somewhere i will not have that...
so kids, that's the latest...hoping to know something by the middle of the month...ready for good things that stick...ready to be able to have something good in my life that will just get better and not worse for a change...cautiously optimistic...
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
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